|
|
|
|
Happy New Years | Good-bye Regrets | Circle Game (serendipity?) | Images of the spring kind. | Celtic Alley(Pugwash NS) | Important Things | ...what are you perceiving now? | ...Pictorial scenery | ...Draws to Rip | ...Short wave downloads to loop | Summer Flash | Dirty Tricks of the Supernatural Kind...(new wave added) | Madness of absolute | In the Dark Times | Last Trumpets of Summer | Burnin Down The House | Guess Who | What ever | Chicks | Guitars ( elaborated) | Sarah says...... | Jan saying.... | Pumpkin People | Timely contrast | .................................mailto:author |
|||||||||||
|
A good friend asked me after reading some of my rantings. Why do I some times switch suddenly from the first person ,to the third person? I guess because I have confusion whether it's the worlds madness ,inflicted on me, or it's mine reflected to the world. Which probably doesn't clear things up, but maybe illustrate the ambiguity of personal responsibility verses the worlds. I called these verses rantings ,because I obviously don't know poetic form. Maybe some day I'll have the time and patience to smooth out my rough edges, Ghostly feelings of not Sometimes my spirit shallows Traces of passion looking for heart engagement Feelings not finding contact points in body I'm still to young to be so faint of heartbeat I don't like to take ownership of such distraction And I hope the distraction doesn't take possession of me I'm hoping for that sunny cure all ,smelling like jasmine There you, go, there is still joy left in me
You Know, I was in a no-mans land One side wanted me to act out to it's script, The other wanted me to behave and shut up I was being pounded by both sides while trying to walk a tight rope Life was a living hell There seems to be a poisonous substance on the transmission This may explain my poisonous responces You seem to be drunk as the lord,forceing your concepts to me All I want to do is escape your hell fire I do not want to relive the past I remember it as poisonous and nothing will change that. There is no reconciliation with intolarance I can not change a unwieldly institution,and it cannot me I remember her in her mid teens She knew no boundaries and felt entirely entitled Let me understand you clearly You want me to find a sugar tit So's you can feed off of me; right That sounds like multi-level vampirism to me May be immeditiatly gratifying to me, but your needs will eventually over burden us all I don't want to co-depend any one I care about, into such a trap So dam you pusher!! Pre-Destine will The concept of Pre-destiny, to me, is a setup for pathological thought processes I suppose it could be argued that I'm afraid, because of my past shaky mental well being I caution, because I think I've been the victim of such scams, and I'm the wiser,only after being burned repeatedly I think we're open to being preyed upon by nature of our humanness We all like to think we're intelligent,good looking,natural charmers,and psychics His Plan is simple he's going to get you drunk,then get you out on thin ice,then agitate you,making you crash through,making him look like a wise guy Need of sun Absence of this mood enhancer causes need We remember the good of the rays, only Of course eventually the fulfillment of of our solar need will inverse to over exposure I guess this anology would would true of a lot of forces of nature Why send a well intending fax when so many get so hard about a hard copy It's like disturbing the old hens And being accused of being a chicken stalker If some one is down, then I guess she's isolated There is freedom in not caring Freedom is having choice of heart involvement Not to be terrorized by misappropriated concerns Not worrying what the neighbors do or display Not caring who's getting screwed or not Leaving the sales flyers in the dirt Forgetting to shave, and not caring Not being aware of the ,"You got bankers" problem Being so oblivious as what to wear, that the fashion police give up I admit this behavior is not very popular I will have to pull up my boot straps eventually, and join humanity I do not want to be pacified with a complicated belief system I want to have my wits about me, and clear headed I'm not letting you weave some sort of plausible explanation out of this foolishness It's just plain wicked, what your doing ,and I want no part of it. Your would eventually have to demonize me to make your myth work And I don't want that constructed on my back Do you fancy being the Russian Front ? Your unconquered territory ,an objective in this war of nuts I don't think you'll find this to flattering ,to find out. My refusal as a war horse is making the warrior nuts Why don't I call him Mars Guess what your handle would be? Eternal Quagmire My house is a catch 22 nightmare This may sound like dramatics But dramatics seem to rule this bedlam I guess the inmate doesn't run this place of exile So why take responsibility for this maddness? Honour this ,will ya! Just what kind of game are you playing me? Am I in trouble for not honouring your daughters needs? I didn't support your favourite charity? I won't go to your church? I won't vote for your party? I wouldn't be caught dead drinking with your kind? My sensibilities are wrong, because I generally clash yours, across the board? I won't help you protect your secrets? Obviously I won't play ball with you. I'd just get left field any ways I won't solider your cause ,because I think your an idiot You say I'm nuts ,because I dare defy you I just profiled you ,and guess what? I think your criminally insane!! Why would you conspire with a troublemaker? Why would you trust her? She'd sell you out, like she would me. Your strange tact You seem to try to control through disgust these days Have you lost confidence in your sexuality? Is causing me pain a replacement for good response? Most move on when things get this bad Can't you stand letting your object of hatred go free? The jeopardy of open minded I know there is risk of buzzkill in talking about the perils in openness In fact ,con to openness, is the fear of buzzkill in certain circles Gang mentality is con to openness all together If cool is dependant on fear of the uncool ,then what's so cool about it And I'm starting to hear myself getting encumbered with legalistic arguement Wouldn't it be nice to just hear the music ,without the accompanying hype Why in the bag? Why do they want Charlie in the bag? Aren't I as valuable in the bush? Am I intolerably quick out of captivity Does my free wheeling ways disturb you? Why is there this need to sit on me? At the risk of sounding really crass How can you trust a dealer that won't let you kick the tires? Of course there's that burger analogy I guess you can see where this coming from, And of course ,where this is going
Why so humbled? If I go strong , I'll just clash If I'm submissive ,it'll just be to much of a pity There is no happy medium, and I know why
A word of caution My expectations are not set high It's a long story You may find it boring
Why do I appear so heartless? Well, it's a no brainer To keep it safe from this entity of many forms, But ever present.
Look, if you want to issue me! Please confront me frontally or call on telephone! Stop employing good well intentioned people To unwittingly do your dirty work!!
Why do I draw lighting bolts? What makes my presence such a perversion To the present played out ,as is? It's like I'm illegally present from another place and time
I bet within the radious of my community Someone special must have hit the jackpot I can smell the success I know ,to bad for me
It's the promise of getting better, But really getting worse There is nothing to redeem I'm not stupid It's only a ploy to get into your clutches You can't negotiate with a liar There is no guilt my my part, because I don't know who you are Based on what I've been told ,you have no bases to hold me Is that fishing spelled as phishing or a lawyer's letter from a destabilized country I'm not being cute to be clever ,but trying to out whit your advance
Your logic does not compute for me You say you want copies But you say I'm defective I'm not comprehending You say I'm special But you abuse me You say there is a higher cause to wait for I hope I'm not waiting for spaceships You want me to better myself But take a ways my tools of self determination Am I supposed to wait for ravens to feed me? I thinks your a sometimes high flyer ,sometimes low rider That's why your directive is so confusing
What if ,no regrets? The above statement is probably an impossibility But deep down there is no rational Just need of completion Can our heads tell our foolish hearts to wise up? Maybe sometimes this could only be an unbearable suck up ? I know need for rational is very annoying to many Even the so called rational struggle with this secretly Now that I waded into the deep end I know, I can't formulate sanity, but just release this thing ,I fear
The Buddhist monks atone every morning for the bugs they crush during the travels of the day Here's a stupid thought, do you things the bugs do the same. And what does this deep reflection mean. Maybe I'm suffering from environmental disease
You know ,your efforts to demoralize ,intimidate, trick, and baffle me have made me quite a piece of work. Your efforts to destroy ,trusting ,innocent little old me has reconstructed me into that monster in your way . I'm not bluffing or bragging, and not wanting this indignant advance of yours . But why don't you work around me. That would be much easier for the both of us, wouldn't it?
The only thing huge about your teachings ,is the enormity of effort to weave a mythical story out of old prophecy , history theory ,and to-days events
Do you know I treat your transmissions as demon speak? Are you aware your on a liars network? Your garble is to annoying and static for me to listen to ,and try to extract anything meaning full Why don't you try good old fashion wired communications
Yes, I'm frustrated No, I'm not putting on a show for you
Am I mistaking a plea for help, for a personal attack? It's just that it seems so needy, that it seems to be threatening What would make you happy? If I were to believe you ,and in passion, make a fool of myself? I must really be a challenge to you. Don't you have something more horrific to do? Than to antagonize little ole me What is your sick fascination with me, anyway? All you have done is, prove me right about you But isn't that what your trying to do to me Prove yourself right about me But why with such force? I hate to say it ,but I feel very persecuted.
Do not entertain this menace!!! Do not trust this mistress with your thoughts She usually introduces herself as Beautiful Red head Maybe because I'm a guy, go figure. The only mystery ,is how she gets inside your skull The rest is her flexing her suggestive powers She'll try to make you think till it hurts I guess it's her way of existing By conquering your inner space
I resist making Mountains out of mole hills Only to build bunkers underlying
I think they keep on recreating the events of 1973 To confuse my memory ,and possibly implicate new perpetrators Possibly to protect the guilty
This so called good and evil struggle Is going to look more like a murky spy game and she's no thriller , but a chill
Why are you trying to make sense of something that doesn't? Just what are you trying to rationalize You can`t balance, what is unbalanced Your cannot define, what is indefinable The reason is, it wants to mystify its beholder The more it become object ,the more it changes It wants attention, just to deceive, and glorify itself This so called angel ,is more demon to me
Gees ,we all want a little respect Every body wants respect The so called president to that Ben guy From terrorism to the counter terrorism the big guys seem to be off their game Good guy, bad guy, they seem to be getting pretty grey It's not making good television, how can we experience the magic if we're wise to them None of that simplistic Rock them ,sock them heroism To complex and ,deeply in sighted to hold the masses in suspense Why does truth has to be so much like the dreaded quagmire, boring The hellfire ramparts are in video form now ,a mere cyber experience of what the glory was How can we possibly take the gods seriously
I don't pretend to be a good judge But I know what's phony If that horse ran ,then I don't know which race? If that crime was committed ,then who is the victim ? Is it name that tune, or choose your punishment? What I'm saying is ,nothing to nothing
She's the anti of my dreams If I was to be romantically hopeful She'd dash my hopes with complicated thought processes If I was to happily anticipate ,she'd fill me with negative anxiety If I appear to be getting prosperous ,she'd try to disgrace me with failure If I'm lookin good, then she tries to make me feel bad Apparently I wreaked her dreams of enslaving me years ago And I've been paying ever since
I don't trust you Because you appear to be serving an enemy of mine Just throw it all out in the trash ,I don't care
Sticky tentacles This cling on is impossible to get rid of Its tentacle's hold doesn't want to be denied It wants to consolidate it grip by making me compromise Even my resistance can be grappled into loss of face I think maybe only my steady non compliance, will win the match
This Wiley Predator Has employed good people To grasp so called righteous power It's a charming pied piper ,unless your wise. Then a cruel jailer
Just what are you channeling me? What ever it is, its frying my circuits Are you being purposely incoherent ,or is that I can't comprehend? It hurts like passing square thoughts threw round holes Maybe your trying to nuke my brain. Assaults Maybe there are assaults because I think the "Sweet Hosts" are more attractive than the "Blinded nightingale"
Anti-hero Being an anti-hero is wise when heroism is unwise I guess that's a no-brainer Lacking romantic motivation would be a symptom of non faith Or disbelief of heart appeal What I'm getting at is there is something rotten in Denmark
Sudden Realization Gee's why didn't some one tell me I was carrying on a war of wits to my self Better than being engaged in a real battle with a innocent bystander , I guess You know I have all the confidence of a man that can't win So guess what ,I don't care Legends , not I never had ambitions to make big bangs I'd never consider to build monster trucks to wow the children I think terrorism is over rated I guess I'm no fun I might be tempted to try to turn a sow's ear into a silk purse
You, know what? I think I prefer sex to a mind melt. If that's what is being offered? Forgive me ,but I find you a little confusing I think a mind melt would hurt That's my experience
Maintaining Cool You know , cool is every thing I'd do any thing to feel well being I don't care who I embarrass in my contortions to feel of sanity I don't need to please those who will never understand If that's arrogant ,then I'm that What I think reality is ,then that's my fix
Ultimately we are only responsible for our own actions I hate to say it, but my finest moments are when I'm absent ,sometimes And yes, some of my smoothest moves was inaction Embarrassingly ,restraint has been my best play And of course my lip has got me into and out of hot water regularly
Why make it another cool summer? It's not that I want to be so hard about circumstance It's that circumstance is what's sticky But that was always the problem And I do seem to be defeated by it Maybe I can get new angles worked out Maybe guile is the secret to smashing the wall
Hey, dumb ass It not about sex ,Its about power
If this stupid spell has already been damaged by yours truly? Then why do insist on its completion? All your doing is dragging me ,kicking ,and screaming ,though the passage of time To destination as a very unhappy camper And do you think we'll kiss and make up The odds are, that hell will freeze up to.
Addressing persistent tinnitus Do I Bore you that much? Why don't you pick on some that cares ,instead? You know I'm not taken by you I see through you because I experienced your game years ago. All your doing is wasting my time ,keeping me from day to day activies So what you have done is affect my personal life ,only You did not trick me into drawing more victims into your trap I'm getting tried of having to be so well behaved ,as to not spread the disease. Can I shame you into leaving me alone?
Dear Father Your life here is done It's really sad to miss you But your memory refrains joy It will take years to process what you mean to me I'll never be able to return ,but maybe pay forward your kindness The world desperately needs a gentleman like you And I'm a lucky man to be your son
Ok, Davenport, I said it? Is it a sucker play?
How stupid do I look so far? I suppose I could have gone off the deep end thinking the CIA was messing with me But it was little ole you
Young Prey I hate to be so annoyingly cliché But a stopped clock is wrong most of the time A stopped clock may seem coolly out of time But not with it, or correct. Tuning out of reality, just makes oblivion of self determination You'd be lost like soulless radio receivers You would hear the con in ethics You'd know the pro in mayhem Why do I always get the asses role? Why is there this dominatrix's expectation that I'll screw up? I tell ya, there is no respect for this boy. I am very capable of being a idiot on my own ,thank you very much. I don't need to prove this determination right Supposed G-man You know, your a slick talker I fear your going to set me up for failure Like a Government agency In reality ,I'm far from meeting my own standards The brass ring you offer, is far out of reach Dear Misrepresentative I guess this an open letter to whom plays the mocking game. After years of having to listen to your lies, misrepresentations, half truths, attacks, dirty tricks, extortion, attempted blackmail ,and general malice, I'm no closer to the truth. Which I don't expect to learn as long you have my ear. What gave you way, is your nasty ways ,and deceitful patterns. I'd never dare try to profile you because it would make me seem malicious my self. Yours truly
You know acting like your serious is a red flag to some I guess a certain devil-may-care attitude is a defense of the insecure But there is doubt when there is so much deceit You have to play your cards carefully
You know I could start screaming the sky is falling, Or that the universe sucks But I've done that. Every one giggled, and then I was cool But stoned teenagers were easily entertained
With in ,with out of your mind Why such strange coinage for a title? Imagine the micro of your mind ,inversing to macro, the universe It's a drug like induced meeting of your own mind from, with out An uncomfortable Omni aware like delusion Are the Gods angry with me ,or what. I could go to a party saying welcome to my night mare ,as if they get me Yes ,I'll get laughs ,but not with, but with out me
Treacherous June This Petite strawberry Blonde This wallop of a girl Are you as dangerous as I am lead to believe? Are you the screaming need? I know your striking ,but are you the Thunder Goddess Or are you a showy distraction from the red devil. Why am I so cryptic? Well your code is kind of Mafioso to It's like murder by innuendo
Dirty Tricks of the Supernatural Kind
My web log with Human Slant News
|
|
||||||||||
